Bring on the Cozy!

It’s only October 2nd but it’s glorious! I am feeling the cozy fall vibes and am trying so hard to make the most of it. Fall is way too short, IMO. 

I have been adulting this week. It does feel good to get a few things taken care of. I had to get new tires on my car, along with the regular service, so there went my house payment that I didn’t have. Ha! It feels good, even if I spent the money on something else. Plus, that’s money I didn’t take out of savings.

We are celebrating mom and dad’s birthdays by having family dinner at Maddox tonight. They will be paying for us one last time. Bittersweet. I’ve also got a few fun things planned throughout the month. I’ve also started on some Fall/Halloween type of reading: light horror, mysteries, gothic, and urban fantasy. That definitely helps the mood. 

I am feeling a lot better, mentally. This is such a weird time of life. I know it’s all hormonal and related to whatever cycle I’m on, but man, it’s crazy that I was so tired, sad, angry, emotional and then just snapped out of it. 

General conference weekend is coming up. I feel like I should probably try and listen as much as possible for my own peace. There is rain in the forecast, so the plan is that I will be baking and doing projects and sitting under my minky and just have a nice, cozy weekend at home. Can't Wait!

Fan X

I had a fun time at Fan X last Friday. I went down to SL on the train with Spencer and Livi and a few of her friends. They were dressed up as Berdly characters. I didn't know who/what that was until they showed me and then I actually saw quite a few of them that I could recognize at the con. 

I only made it to 1 panel and that one was about Snow White and the influence the cartoon has had in 75 years. I wanted to go to others but then my sister came down with the twins and we just hung out and people watched and wandered the vendor floor. It was still fun. 

I've decided next year I may buy a 2 day pass and go to more panels on my own one day and then have fun with friends/family the other day. Or, I talked to one of the volunteers and I might consider volunteering as well. We'll see. 

I didn't spend much money, but I did get some fun chocolate at one of the booths. I ate the Han Solo and it was mint chocolate cookie truffle and very tasty. 

It's cool and feels like Fall this morning. I love it.

September 25

It’s a silly title for a post, but I can’t think of anything else. I actually can’t believe how fast September has gone. I blinked and we are at the end. I need to make sure I really take time to stop or slow down through October and November so I don’t miss my favorite season. 

I paid off the mortgage on my home this week. I went to the bank and wired the money and the next day got an email from them saying it was paid in full and I’ll be getting other papers, etc soon. It feels good. It will feel even better next Wednesday when the money does not come out of my account for the payment. I only get to enjoy it for tomorrow’s paycheck though, because I’ve already upped my 401k amount so the next check I get will actually be smaller. It’s ok. Of course, I can’t predict the future, but I’m on track to be able to retire without too many worries. 

I’ve had a few snags this week with crazy emotions, but am feeling better overall. More leveled out. I hope I can continue like this for a little while. 

Better?

Some of the words of the hymn we sung in sacrament meeting today gave me some hope.

How great, how glorious, how complete

Redemption’s grand design,

Where justice, love, and mercy meet

In harmony divine!

While I can’t sit around and do nothing, God’s plan has been in place since the beginning and He knows how it ends and has already taken care of everything that needed to be done. It helps to remember that.

My yarrow bloomed twice this year. This makes me so happy.

I got out my 4 Fall decorations a day early ha ha. I’m switching my letterboard this afternoon. I will be turning on my electric flickering candles. I changed one lamp to have a Victorian gaslight colored lightbulb. I’ve already had fall scents in the wax warmer. Bring it on, I’m ready for official Autumn.

And I do feel a lot better than I did on Friday. 

Nope

Man, I have hit my wall and I hit it hard. Actually, I hit it yesterday. The week did not get better at work and I’ve been weepy and depressed and exhausted. My well is dry and I have no **** to give, as the saying goes. And we still have a problem so even though I won’t be working a lot, I will be checking in and getting some stuff ready for an early Monday morning meeting. 

I have next Friday off and I think I may take the following Monday as well and give myself a 4 day weekend. I’m getting my permanent crown that day so I can’t go far, but the point is to not be at work. 

I’m not really sure what my problem is. I know there is definitely some perimenopause going on. I get upset and weepy at some stuff I know would not usually bother me. And there’s some stress and sadness for my job, my family, the state of the world in general. 

I’m doing stuff this weekend that I’m looking forward to, so I’m not depressed enough that I’m not leaving my house or whatnot. The cure is always the same: get enough sleep, not too much caffeine, get enough exercise, blah blah blah…. 

For now I’m taking the evening off. I’m out of milk so I’ll remedy that. And I’ll see if I can get some rest recharge this weekend. I’ll be off of social media again until Monday.

Retail Therapy

Hello self! Remember when I said I wouldn’t spend any more money? Ha ha ha ha ha ha 

I had a really nice weekend. I stayed off of all social media for 2 whole days and it felt wonderful. I spent some time with my family and spent some time outside. I even tackled a big project I didn’t know I wanted to do: I cleaned out all my piano music. It felt so good to go through it all and get it organized. I had 2 copies of My Heart Will Go On and nobody even needs 1 copy of that song. I have some to donate because I’m never going to play them and then a bunch of printed off copies of things to shred. I had more duplicates of songs than I care to admit. So things started out well.

Monday, I drove to my office to find that the plant had no water. I made it about 45 minutes then drove home to work. I had brought peaches for breakfast and with no way to wash my hands after I peeled them, it just wasn’t going to work. And then the day got worse and yesterday was even worse. I had a project go live and just had a lot of issues to work through. Finally, after a really long day, I can say that only one of the issues was actually our system. Everything else was people not using all the information we gave them or watching the training that we recorded. So it’s been frustrating and I expect another long, frustrating day today. But today, I feel a little better prepared to deal with it.

Last night after work, I got some exercise and finished a puzzle. Then I took myself off to the bookstore. Mary Roach has a new book out and I decided to buy it rather than borrow from the library - still not borrowing paper books from them since my fine. ;) I ended up with 3 books. Oops! Then I got some chocolates and a 1 liter bottle of Dr. Pepper. Retail therapy!

Anyway, I did feel better and got some sleep last night. I may be doing a few breaks to take tiny walks today. I’ll do what I need to do to deal with the stress. It won’t be this way forever. 

 

Money, Money, Money

Ug. I am my own worst enemy. Ha ha, I recently went on an online shopping spree and bought absolutely nothing that I needed. Shirts, sheets, a book, perfume samples, and a few other things. I’ve decided that I need to net zero a little bit here so I’m going to try and clean out my bookshelves and my closet for a D.I. run. It’s almost the weekend and that’s a good activity. 

I’ve put myself on a spending freeze until my savings account gets back up. It’s the lowest it has been in a long time because I just paid for my Europe trip later this year. It’s only 1 account; I have more savings (this is the one I can spend from) but I do hate to see it getting so low. And honestly, this one account probably still has more money in it than most Americans have saved, if you can believe the news.

So I have made up a budget for Christmas spending and giving. And I have so many things already at home that I can do instead of sitting on the couch bored and spending money. Puzzles, books, cross stitching, blanket making, rag wreath craft, adult coloring books, playing the piano, walking, yoga, strength training, cleaning, sorting, cooking…I think I’m going to stick this list in my calendar notebook so I can refer back to it. LOL I don’t really like to sit and watch tv, but I should absolutely not be bored. Plus, over half this list can be done while listening to books, tv, podcasts, and music. 

I’m a spender. I know it. It’s my natural inclination. I also have to be the one to save because nobody is going to do it for me. I’m still not in debt. I still have a nice savings account. I’m still going to do some fun things by myself and with friends and family. But I’m also going to try and curb the impulsiveness for the rest of the year. I can have impulsive fun next year for my birthday.